Thought I would update everybody on how my life is going…

Well, I’m unemployed again. AND I FUCKING LOVE IT! I used my last paycheck from my job at an airline to buy a bunch of wholesale herbs, spices, teas, essential oils and etc. and I’m selling it on eBay for extra cash. I also created my own store online! www.tearsoffrankincense.net. I sell like over 900 items. So far, this is really awesome. I don’t have to leave my apartment except to smoke and take the cats out for fresh air. Oh, yeah. I FINALLY GOT MY CATS BACK! The titties! Jeremy’s mom brought them with her when they came for a visit last month. I could not be happier. Anyway, so I work from home, have time to clean and cook and all those other lovely house-husband treats that I strangely love doing…and I to have time to play with kitties throughout the day and work on creative projects I’ve been storing up in my head. Its great. If I make enough money, which I doubt, I want to open my own shop. That would kick ass. Jeremy doubts that will happen and so do I but hey, I can dream. I don’t care, at least I’m trying to make my life work FOR me instead of against me. Its fun. I don’t even mind North Carolina as much. I STILL HATE IT. But I can deal with it better now that I don’t have to see and hear the dumb ass southerns as much as I did.

Anyways, we are also moving out the ghetto finally! Most likely to another development. I hate developments but thats all they have for cheap down here. I miss PA, where you could rent a nice house or half a double for $450 with everything included. We found one place though, a row house, that is decent. Better than deerwood crossing anyway. And the area isn’t ghetto. Its nice. Parks and trees and shit. Still, I hope we find a single house somewhere. We want our own house but we can’t get a loan due to blah blah blah. And we don’t want to stay in North Carolina forever…So its off to another shitty apartment/townhouse somewhere.

The city of winston salem still sucks. A fake city. More like an overly large town trying to be a city. I guess it used to be a really small town and then with the new hospital and colleges and shit it blow up before it was really structured to become a city. Its very ass backwards and congested. There is nothing original or exciting either. Everything is a chain.

Here, I’ll give you guys an idea of the whole city: Every single plaza is 8 blocks and consists of : A walmart, a KFC, a Bojangles, A church’s chicken, A waffle house, A dollar general, A dollar tree, A sonics, A subway, A chinese buffet, A papa Johns, A blockbuster, A food lion, A lowes hardware, A lowes foods, A harris teeter, A steak house, A cookout, A starbucks, An expensive furniture store, and etc. Just strips of same chain stores. Nothing fun. Then the next 8 blocks is expensive condos on side of steet and really badly, should be condemmed ghetto shacks on the other side of street. Then the next 8 blocks are the same exact shops as above. Repeat for about 100 miles in every direction!

The only fun non-chain place we found and love is the tea bar. Its called the bubbling well and its wonderful. It has tons and tons of rare and common teas to choose. You walk over to the wall and select a tea, they let you smell it and blah and then prepare it for you. The whole shop is filled with herbal tea stuff. Tea pots, strainers, books, whatever you can think of they got, then there is the tonic section. All little bottles of herbal tonics to buy or test out in your drink. They have fun stuff like green tea chocolate and herbal smoothies. Its awesome. I’m a tea freak so its great. A whole large shop all about herbal tea. Thats the only fun place in winston salem. Every “city” has a tea bar so its nothing special but winston salem in nothing but chain stores so its fun to have something that is small and independent.

Lets see…The only other thing I can think of thats fun in North Carolina is…Korners folly in kernersville. Me and Jer took his parents there and it was cool. Its a Large house that has a really weird interior. Its called the strangest house in the world. It really is. Its awesome, I want to live there. I can’t really explain it. Its one of those things you just have to see to appreciate. Its really cool though.

Thats all the fun and excitement NC has to offer. Not even a good cemetery to frequent. Well, they have a really nice cemetery but it has a rule about no people in there at night due to crack heads and hookers and gang fuckers. Its patrolled and if caught its a big mess because the cemetery is privately owned and they sue. Not worth all the trouble really. Pennsylvania had the nicest cemetery and you could go there at any time of day or night. It was fun. And if the cops came in and stopped you they didn’t do anything. They just ran a check on you ID and told you behave yourself and left. I miss PA cemeteries! Its so hard to exist in this world without a nice cemetery to walk around in!! Help. (If you would like to contribute to the worthy cause of buying me and Jeremy our very own Mausoleum to play in at a swell cemetery near you please send donations to our paypal accounts! It will be greatly appreciated. It will also help us be able to go on living and continue the wonderful entertainment we are so well known for providing to everybody who knows us. Everybody better pay for our services! We are not free. Pay up! Some of you owe me for the last 15 years! We charge $20 per year you have know us. For people who do not know us but are overwhelmed with entertainment already, you may also donate as much as you would like. Thanks guys!)

Hmm, so your updated on me and jer, NC, business propositions…That may be all I have to offer you at the moment.

Oh! So Jeremy’s parents wanted a family portrait done while they were here. We look fun. And a single portrait of me and Jeremy was done. Now we know how delightful we are to stare at! Shit, I don’t know how you guys do it. I don’t think I’d be able to tolerate being around such awesome people without feeling ashamed of myself for lacking such admirable, amazing, astonishing, astounding, awe-inspiring, awesome, brilliant, divine, dynamic, enjoyable, extraordinary, fabulous, fantastic, incredible, magnificent, marvelous, miraculous, outstanding, phenomenal, pleasant, pleasing, remarkable, sensational, staggering, startling, strange, stupendous,superb, surprising, swell, terrific, tremendous, wondrous greatness! * I see you shiver with antici…….PATION!

sWELL, thats all the dirt I have on us for now. Stay tune for more fun in the next volume – Jeremy and Marla move out of ghetto Volume 1. Available for purchase on July, 12 2007. Price is $1.00 an issue, you can email us your requests. Thanks for reading! ( We don’t really sell issues, sorry guys!)

* This volume is dedicated to all our wonderful fans. Without you, we’d have to entertain ourselves. (And we all know how bad that could be. Two minds as fun and creative as ours trying to out do each other on a daily basis for the sick entertainment of the other….We thank you for allowing us to waste a lot less energy and fun on you, our fans! *